Last night I took a few minutes to clean out a closet. I came across the front page section of the San Francisco Chronicle from May 2008. The front page was proclaiming victory in the initial Proposition 8 ballot item. Yes......all gay and lesbian couples could marry in the state of California! It was an exciting time and I was very happy to be in San Francisco the very day of that landmark vote.
Here we are five years later and we saw Prop 8 challenged and overturned just to be overturned again by the U.S. Supreme Court. We saw the Defense of Marriage Act - otherwise known as DOMA - crumble into a fine dust and scattered through the streets of Washington DC. We have even seen a few more states step forward and legalize marriage for all gays and lesbian couples. I think the total state count may be 12. Ok....that's not a lot, but it is 20%!
Now that the federal government will recognize those unions in those 12 states, I have two friends who will take the plunge themselves in the next year with their partners. In both cases, it was something that finally made sense in their 11+ year relationships. I look forward to seeing them both married and continuing their relationships as they have all of these years. It is truly a wonderful thing.
In my tri-state area, Ohio, Kentucky nor Indiana allow for gay marriage. In Ohio, this ban on gay marriage is being challenged by two gentlemen who flew to Baltimore to be married. One of the gentlemen is terminally ill from ALS and his partner would like their life to be recognized as a married couple - with all of the federal benefits and protections that it allows every other married couple. Read their story. If they are successful with their court battle (and I fully expect this to go up to the Ohio Supreme Court or higher) and Ohio ends their ban, there will be a lot of very happy gay and lesbians in the area.
It is my hope that I will be one of those happy souls as well. :)
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Thursday, July 18, 2013
Reflections
As I have posted several times before, my Dad is in a nursing home. He was diagnosed with early onset dementia last August. His dementia has been complicated by two surgeries since then which has re-baselined his condition.
My visits to the nursing home occur about three times a week now. Each time I go I am struck by the fragile nature of the human experience. I don't know if I like being reminded that I too will become old and frail and quite possibly need the support that only a nursing home can provide. This is something I haven't had to think about prior to my father's experience. I guess like so many other people we prefer to live in the moment of today rather than think about 40 years ahead. I mean...why would we? We have so many things to preoccupy our life with at this moment and sometimes it is just enough to organize those thoughts and activities.
Yesterday, I couldn't help "thinking back" for these older folks. What was their life like? Do they have children? What kind of jobs did they have? Did they go to Florida on vacations? Did they know true love in their lifetime?
Their actions nor the expressions on their faces answer those questions for me. I am left wondering and that leaves me feeling lonely for them. How much they actually remember is beyond my scope of understanding at this point because they are all suffering from some form of dementia and their answers are not always a clear and accurate portrayal of their lives. Even for my Dad.....his answers to my questions - for which I know the answers - are not always correct. His state of mind has him clear one day and working a plumbing job the next.
Nevertheless, my heart goes out to these people. They have no control of the disintegration of their minds and the utter collapse of every memory they have ever created. My only hope is that all of them have someone who loves them and respects them for the lives they no longer remember.
My visits to the nursing home occur about three times a week now. Each time I go I am struck by the fragile nature of the human experience. I don't know if I like being reminded that I too will become old and frail and quite possibly need the support that only a nursing home can provide. This is something I haven't had to think about prior to my father's experience. I guess like so many other people we prefer to live in the moment of today rather than think about 40 years ahead. I mean...why would we? We have so many things to preoccupy our life with at this moment and sometimes it is just enough to organize those thoughts and activities.
Yesterday, I couldn't help "thinking back" for these older folks. What was their life like? Do they have children? What kind of jobs did they have? Did they go to Florida on vacations? Did they know true love in their lifetime?
Their actions nor the expressions on their faces answer those questions for me. I am left wondering and that leaves me feeling lonely for them. How much they actually remember is beyond my scope of understanding at this point because they are all suffering from some form of dementia and their answers are not always a clear and accurate portrayal of their lives. Even for my Dad.....his answers to my questions - for which I know the answers - are not always correct. His state of mind has him clear one day and working a plumbing job the next.
Nevertheless, my heart goes out to these people. They have no control of the disintegration of their minds and the utter collapse of every memory they have ever created. My only hope is that all of them have someone who loves them and respects them for the lives they no longer remember.
Monday, June 24, 2013
Espionage Stuff
Even if you aren't a news junkie, it is likely that you are aware of the recent news story about the NSA whistle blower - Edward Snowden. The last couple of weeks the media has been covering his every move and comment after he decided to tell the world how our government handles spying and surveillance. Currently, he is seeking asylum in Ecuador to avoid being prosecuted by the United States.
While I have commended the actions of whistle blowers from time to time, I just can't in this case. Anyone else remember this?
Here is why I stand in support of the government and their ways and means of reviewing phone records, emails, etc. of American citizens. As a result of 9/11, there were thousands of men and women who volunteered for the military to combat terrorism to allow us to continue to enjoy the level of freedom that we have been accustomed. Many of them died for that service to keep us free.
I want the government to do whatever is necessary to keep us safe. Currently, they are pulling phone records to see who I have called. Heck, they may even be listening in on my conversations.....I don't know for sure. What I do know.....is this is the very least that I can do to support my freedom. I think as Americans we should all contribute to the well being of the nation. Why should our men and women in the military be the only ones to shoulder the brunt of the action for our security?
If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to worry about right?
While I have commended the actions of whistle blowers from time to time, I just can't in this case. Anyone else remember this?
Here is why I stand in support of the government and their ways and means of reviewing phone records, emails, etc. of American citizens. As a result of 9/11, there were thousands of men and women who volunteered for the military to combat terrorism to allow us to continue to enjoy the level of freedom that we have been accustomed. Many of them died for that service to keep us free.
I want the government to do whatever is necessary to keep us safe. Currently, they are pulling phone records to see who I have called. Heck, they may even be listening in on my conversations.....I don't know for sure. What I do know.....is this is the very least that I can do to support my freedom. I think as Americans we should all contribute to the well being of the nation. Why should our men and women in the military be the only ones to shoulder the brunt of the action for our security?
If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to worry about right?
Monday, June 10, 2013
Music
I think music means a little something different to everyone. Some like to sing, write, play an instrument or listen to thousands of tunes on their iPhones/Droids. Music fills our lives and is used to "date' our lives as well. I have a friend who knows exactly what year a song was released based solely on what was going on in her life at the time. Music provides the soundtrack by which we look back and remember.
I have had my share of musical moments in my lifetime. I have made more "mix tapes" than I can count, sang in my high school chorus for all four years and even managed to pick up a guitar and play in our grade school church group. I can pound out some notes on a piano as well although even that is hit and miss.
When my father spent a month at Good Samaritan Hospital this year, I would pass the same quiet Baby Grand in the lobby. No one ever played it. It sat there silently just begging someone to "tickle the ivory's". Now...I have always wanted to learn to play just one song really well on the piano. Just one.....I'm not greedy nor do I want to embark on a new musical adventure by building out a piano repertoire for myself. I just would like to learn one song and I have decided that the one song would be "Roll Out The Barrel". Yes.....that might bring you a chuckle but it is a lively song that generally brings a smile to someones face when they hear it.
So you can imagine my disappointment the day I looked at the hospital Baby Grand closely.
"Please refrain from playing any music other than that of a "soothing" nature." Really. No wonder the piano is quiet all of the time. I mean....what is more soothing than a fun-loving rendition of "Roll Out The Barrel"? The last thing that I would want to hear during my recuperation period is a classical number from Mozart. And besides that......you have to be a volunteer. Apparently the volunteers are struggling with the whole "soothing nature" idea as well.
So my dream of filling up the lobby of GSH with the sounds of "Roll Out The Barrel" have been dashed for now. On my father's last day at the hospital, I was very very tempted to streak through the lobby and play "Chopsticks" just because it was so forbidden. However, I just couldn't bear being arrested by a hospital guard and having "Chopsticks" tainted in my memory for the rest of my life.
I would have loved telling the story though...........
I have had my share of musical moments in my lifetime. I have made more "mix tapes" than I can count, sang in my high school chorus for all four years and even managed to pick up a guitar and play in our grade school church group. I can pound out some notes on a piano as well although even that is hit and miss.
When my father spent a month at Good Samaritan Hospital this year, I would pass the same quiet Baby Grand in the lobby. No one ever played it. It sat there silently just begging someone to "tickle the ivory's". Now...I have always wanted to learn to play just one song really well on the piano. Just one.....I'm not greedy nor do I want to embark on a new musical adventure by building out a piano repertoire for myself. I just would like to learn one song and I have decided that the one song would be "Roll Out The Barrel". Yes.....that might bring you a chuckle but it is a lively song that generally brings a smile to someones face when they hear it.
So you can imagine my disappointment the day I looked at the hospital Baby Grand closely.
"Please refrain from playing any music other than that of a "soothing" nature." Really. No wonder the piano is quiet all of the time. I mean....what is more soothing than a fun-loving rendition of "Roll Out The Barrel"? The last thing that I would want to hear during my recuperation period is a classical number from Mozart. And besides that......you have to be a volunteer. Apparently the volunteers are struggling with the whole "soothing nature" idea as well.
So my dream of filling up the lobby of GSH with the sounds of "Roll Out The Barrel" have been dashed for now. On my father's last day at the hospital, I was very very tempted to streak through the lobby and play "Chopsticks" just because it was so forbidden. However, I just couldn't bear being arrested by a hospital guard and having "Chopsticks" tainted in my memory for the rest of my life.
I would have loved telling the story though...........
Tuesday, June 04, 2013
Jury Duty?
Exactly what I said when I opened the envelope that contained those lucky words.....You have been chosen. It also came with a lengthy questionnaire that zeroed in on all those pitfall questions that may or may not qualify me to be a member of a jury.
So....at 47 I finally get chosen for jury duty. I must say that this may be infinitely more fun if it were in a major city and not Dearborn County Indiana. My mind automatically went to some of the major arrests that have occurred in the last year. There were some murders, money laundering and vehicular homicides. I figured it would have to be a crime of that magnitude to warrant a jury trial. We are not talking about chicken coop raiding or petty theft here. Still, this county is not a hotbed of interesting criminal activity and I am at least thankful for that! Oh yeah....and the letter said that I should consider this a privilege to be performing this civic duty.
I filled out the questionnaire and sent it back this past weekend. My jury term is set for July and August. I am a bit interested to see how this unfolds since I am "virgin" to this whole process. I don't expect this to be glamorous, but I am hoping that I get a trial that has a little meat to it. Something interesting but not so involved that it reminds me of "Twelve Angry Men".
No....no angry men.
So....at 47 I finally get chosen for jury duty. I must say that this may be infinitely more fun if it were in a major city and not Dearborn County Indiana. My mind automatically went to some of the major arrests that have occurred in the last year. There were some murders, money laundering and vehicular homicides. I figured it would have to be a crime of that magnitude to warrant a jury trial. We are not talking about chicken coop raiding or petty theft here. Still, this county is not a hotbed of interesting criminal activity and I am at least thankful for that! Oh yeah....and the letter said that I should consider this a privilege to be performing this civic duty.
I filled out the questionnaire and sent it back this past weekend. My jury term is set for July and August. I am a bit interested to see how this unfolds since I am "virgin" to this whole process. I don't expect this to be glamorous, but I am hoping that I get a trial that has a little meat to it. Something interesting but not so involved that it reminds me of "Twelve Angry Men".
No....no angry men.
Friday, May 31, 2013
Summer Fun
Yes.....I said it. Summer! After a pretty chilly Spring.....I am already jumping into the next season which assures us of hot weather and fun activities!
I don't have a lot of firm plans for the Summer. I have several Indiana Fever games lined up and that's about it. I am more excited about taking advantage of what Cincinnati has to offer downtown. There are so many new things going on down there - Party's in the Park, events on Fountain Square, Pride Week, Red's baseball, brand spankin new restaurants and a lively Over the Rhine area - just to name a few.
If you have never been to Cincinnati and don't declare it as one of your tourist destinations, then why not try it the next time you have to take a training class somewhere? The city has been revitalized and you will be pleasantly surprised at what you will experience.
One of those experiences is Over The Rhine. I gotta say.....ten years ago I would have steered you far and wide of that area if you were new here. Poverty and crime were rampant and it just wasn't somewhere you wanted to be if you got lost and had to ask for directions. These days though it is quite the opposite. One of the main draws is Findley Market. Now FM isn't new......it has been there for decades as the local farmers market. In fact I am quite sure that my great-great grandparents probably shopped there when they lived on Green Street. It is quite the market today - not only selling fresh fruits and vegetables (I don't buy Brussels Sprouts from anywhere else) but a wide selection of meats and fish, prepared foods, spices, honey and baked goods. Surrounding FM are some great restaurants and stores offering everything from cookies to beer/wine tastings. It is very easy to kill two hours down there with everything they have to offer! And it is easy to get to from the main city area.......
So what are your Summer plans? Hanging close to home? Taking that dream vacation? There are just so many days of Summer ahead - choose wisely and have fun!
I don't have a lot of firm plans for the Summer. I have several Indiana Fever games lined up and that's about it. I am more excited about taking advantage of what Cincinnati has to offer downtown. There are so many new things going on down there - Party's in the Park, events on Fountain Square, Pride Week, Red's baseball, brand spankin new restaurants and a lively Over the Rhine area - just to name a few.
If you have never been to Cincinnati and don't declare it as one of your tourist destinations, then why not try it the next time you have to take a training class somewhere? The city has been revitalized and you will be pleasantly surprised at what you will experience.
One of those experiences is Over The Rhine. I gotta say.....ten years ago I would have steered you far and wide of that area if you were new here. Poverty and crime were rampant and it just wasn't somewhere you wanted to be if you got lost and had to ask for directions. These days though it is quite the opposite. One of the main draws is Findley Market. Now FM isn't new......it has been there for decades as the local farmers market. In fact I am quite sure that my great-great grandparents probably shopped there when they lived on Green Street. It is quite the market today - not only selling fresh fruits and vegetables (I don't buy Brussels Sprouts from anywhere else) but a wide selection of meats and fish, prepared foods, spices, honey and baked goods. Surrounding FM are some great restaurants and stores offering everything from cookies to beer/wine tastings. It is very easy to kill two hours down there with everything they have to offer! And it is easy to get to from the main city area.......
So what are your Summer plans? Hanging close to home? Taking that dream vacation? There are just so many days of Summer ahead - choose wisely and have fun!
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
WTR Tips
While my blog is not based on the "formalities" of the networking of rooms, this article is a good read for those of us who have networking opportunities as part of our jobs.
100 Tips for Working the Room
100 Tips for Working the Room
Forward Motion
My life lately has been all about the motion of moving forward.
Keep moving....don't stop....can't stop....keep breathing....keep eating......try to sleep well.....eyes straight ahead.....move along little doggy.....
It is the approach that I have taken in my personal life. I don't have time to look back and reflect nor do I have the time to waste energy on things that are simply going nowhere. I am well aware of the type of people I need in my life and I want someone to be there full time to slow me down, assist with my breathing while I keep moving forward in this marathon that I am running. As I have said before, I am not a runner by nature so a good supporting cast is hugely important to my life. It takes commitment to run a marathon and a relationship is a marathon not a sprint.
My father keeps my eyes looking forward. I have had to take control of all aspects of his life to ensure that things keep moving forward in his life. He is battling with his dementia meds at the moment and the doctors are switching out medicinal recipes to see what the best fit is for him. Once that is in check, he can go back to the nursing home. It's been about four weeks of "balancing" and I am eager for him to regain some normalcy to his life. The nursing home is the new normal and it is one that will support him until his final days on this earth. His struggle becomes my struggle. I have spent the last four weeks going through his house in clean up mode. Discarding years (and I mean years) of invoices and tax documents....cleaning out closets and making sense of his garage that contains a lifetime of plumbing tools. With a little help from some knowledgeable friends who know a few more things about tools, my garage sale was a success this past weekend. It was picked clean of things that any handy man or contractor would value. I had a twinge of sadness in regards to the sale - a lifetime of work all summed up in boxes laying out on sawhorses to be picked through by those who didn't know how hard my Dad worked over the years. "It has to be done" I told myself and I moved on from those feelings. The next leg in the race - the house will be put on the market.
Keep moving....don't stop....can't stop....keep breathing....one step in front of the other.....
I keep pressing forward. Summer is right around the corner. I am going out with friends and making new friends. I am making plans for a nice "breakdown" vacation away at the end of Summer so I can just "be". This is what my life is about these days. I am caught up in each moment that comes my way and working with that moment when it arises. Don't get me wrong.....it has not been all gloomy moments. Some moments have been surprisingly sweet and fun and those are the moments that bring me back to the best part of myself and recharge me as I move forward.
Keep moving....don't stop....can't stop....keep breathing....keep eating......try to sleep well.....eyes straight ahead.....move along little doggy.....
It is the approach that I have taken in my personal life. I don't have time to look back and reflect nor do I have the time to waste energy on things that are simply going nowhere. I am well aware of the type of people I need in my life and I want someone to be there full time to slow me down, assist with my breathing while I keep moving forward in this marathon that I am running. As I have said before, I am not a runner by nature so a good supporting cast is hugely important to my life. It takes commitment to run a marathon and a relationship is a marathon not a sprint.
My father keeps my eyes looking forward. I have had to take control of all aspects of his life to ensure that things keep moving forward in his life. He is battling with his dementia meds at the moment and the doctors are switching out medicinal recipes to see what the best fit is for him. Once that is in check, he can go back to the nursing home. It's been about four weeks of "balancing" and I am eager for him to regain some normalcy to his life. The nursing home is the new normal and it is one that will support him until his final days on this earth. His struggle becomes my struggle. I have spent the last four weeks going through his house in clean up mode. Discarding years (and I mean years) of invoices and tax documents....cleaning out closets and making sense of his garage that contains a lifetime of plumbing tools. With a little help from some knowledgeable friends who know a few more things about tools, my garage sale was a success this past weekend. It was picked clean of things that any handy man or contractor would value. I had a twinge of sadness in regards to the sale - a lifetime of work all summed up in boxes laying out on sawhorses to be picked through by those who didn't know how hard my Dad worked over the years. "It has to be done" I told myself and I moved on from those feelings. The next leg in the race - the house will be put on the market.
Keep moving....don't stop....can't stop....keep breathing....one step in front of the other.....
I keep pressing forward. Summer is right around the corner. I am going out with friends and making new friends. I am making plans for a nice "breakdown" vacation away at the end of Summer so I can just "be". This is what my life is about these days. I am caught up in each moment that comes my way and working with that moment when it arises. Don't get me wrong.....it has not been all gloomy moments. Some moments have been surprisingly sweet and fun and those are the moments that bring me back to the best part of myself and recharge me as I move forward.
Monday, March 18, 2013
Milkshake
The last forty five days have been oddly problematic. My father's health continued to take a downward turn aggravated by the general anesthesia he received for prostate surgery. It appears that a big surgery can really do a number on older folks who have a start of dementia. I had to make the decision to place him in a nursing facility. This wasn't an easy decision mind you, but it was one based on the reality of the times. My father simply could not live alone and be in charge of his own well-being any longer. He believed that he could still do the things he always could do without any second thoughts about the ramifications of his actions. This is a dangerous mindset and it would only lead to more worry and "what ifs".
He has had some ups and downs upon entering the nursing home. He has fallen a couple times during his "free spirit" periods and has shown his confused and agitated side to the nurses more than once. The surgery has taken him to a new baseline with his dementia and I notice it every evening I stop by to see him. He talks about his car.....that he doesn't have.....or worries about paying his property tax that I have already paid for him more than once since he has been at the home. However.....despite all of that....he has been eating three square meals and chugs down every chocolate milkshake I bring him on my nightly visits.
Tonight....I got a good progress report from the nurses. He was well behaved ALL day. Victory! It is always good when you are told that he was "best in class". Yes....it is like raising a child. The progress reports.....good or bad.....are very enlightening and it tells me that he is starting to settle in to his new home.
He does not know that his home will be put up for sale in the Spring. I will tell him about that when I get to that point in time. I'd rather not have his progress disturbed or interrupted. Settling down is a good thing. Uproars....not so much. I like the congenial, joking Dad instead of the agitated, nasty guy who appears from time to time.
I have concluded that there are still life lessons that I am meant to learn. It is true that we never stop learning and I know that this too will teach me things that I will someday use later in my life. If someone brings me a milkshake every day when I am 80, I will be a happy girl.
He has had some ups and downs upon entering the nursing home. He has fallen a couple times during his "free spirit" periods and has shown his confused and agitated side to the nurses more than once. The surgery has taken him to a new baseline with his dementia and I notice it every evening I stop by to see him. He talks about his car.....that he doesn't have.....or worries about paying his property tax that I have already paid for him more than once since he has been at the home. However.....despite all of that....he has been eating three square meals and chugs down every chocolate milkshake I bring him on my nightly visits.
Tonight....I got a good progress report from the nurses. He was well behaved ALL day. Victory! It is always good when you are told that he was "best in class". Yes....it is like raising a child. The progress reports.....good or bad.....are very enlightening and it tells me that he is starting to settle in to his new home.
He does not know that his home will be put up for sale in the Spring. I will tell him about that when I get to that point in time. I'd rather not have his progress disturbed or interrupted. Settling down is a good thing. Uproars....not so much. I like the congenial, joking Dad instead of the agitated, nasty guy who appears from time to time.
I have concluded that there are still life lessons that I am meant to learn. It is true that we never stop learning and I know that this too will teach me things that I will someday use later in my life. If someone brings me a milkshake every day when I am 80, I will be a happy girl.
Sunday, February 03, 2013
Super Bowl
It is a bittersweet day for me today. Yes....the Super Bowl is today and it will be fun to watch but it also signals the final day of the NFL season. (sigh) The NFL season is my favorite season.....followed closely by Fall.
There has been a lot of news lately about the dangers of playing football. The long term breakdown to the brain after years of concussions is not an old wives tale anymore. It is real and compelling evidence that as the sport gained in popularity the men who play it have grown as well. The players are bigger, stronger and healthier than those who played 20 years ago. Technology has grown with them with better helmets and body padding. It certainly can never be said that football is a gentleman's game. It is a physical game with a game impact that equals seven car accidents.
Can they make it safer while still allowing the players to tackle? I'm not sure. I certainly don't want to watch flag football on Sundays but I feel for the players and their families who have played the game for our entertainment.
However, we all know that these are not actors on the field. They are paid for what they do....and very nicely I might add. They know the risks and they may think that the doctors are going to act in their best interest. The dollar signs are hard to pass up. Many of these guys were raised in homes that were poorer than most and the expectation to be a success and support their families were great. Everyone knows that there is a lot of money to be made in professional sports if you have the talent to be on one of those teams. I have heard that only 1% of all college athletes will actually play in the NFL.
There are children that pretend to be star players every day in their backyards. They emulate what they see as they play in pony leagues around the nation. Recent developments in brain injuries will cause some parents to pull their sons from football. Others will be hesitant relying on future technology or human intervention to make it safer. Still others will encourage their sons to play despite the known risks perhaps ignoring what the future holds. It is the future after all.
There has been a lot of news lately about the dangers of playing football. The long term breakdown to the brain after years of concussions is not an old wives tale anymore. It is real and compelling evidence that as the sport gained in popularity the men who play it have grown as well. The players are bigger, stronger and healthier than those who played 20 years ago. Technology has grown with them with better helmets and body padding. It certainly can never be said that football is a gentleman's game. It is a physical game with a game impact that equals seven car accidents.
Can they make it safer while still allowing the players to tackle? I'm not sure. I certainly don't want to watch flag football on Sundays but I feel for the players and their families who have played the game for our entertainment.
However, we all know that these are not actors on the field. They are paid for what they do....and very nicely I might add. They know the risks and they may think that the doctors are going to act in their best interest. The dollar signs are hard to pass up. Many of these guys were raised in homes that were poorer than most and the expectation to be a success and support their families were great. Everyone knows that there is a lot of money to be made in professional sports if you have the talent to be on one of those teams. I have heard that only 1% of all college athletes will actually play in the NFL.
There are children that pretend to be star players every day in their backyards. They emulate what they see as they play in pony leagues around the nation. Recent developments in brain injuries will cause some parents to pull their sons from football. Others will be hesitant relying on future technology or human intervention to make it safer. Still others will encourage their sons to play despite the known risks perhaps ignoring what the future holds. It is the future after all.
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Forward Progress
This is my theme of the week.
Tomorrow, my father has a much needed Prostate surgery and I have my first weigh-in after starting the Hudson & Simpson (WW) diet. I am more positive about my activity tomorrow than my father. He is having a bit of confusion today and thinks that tomorrow will not be a "real" surgery. We had a brief argument over the definition of the term "surgery" and then I just gave up because it wasn't worth the energy. I wish I would take that approach most of the time. Some things aren't worth arguing about when you know you are right.
I continue to focus forward and keep walking. I have decided that things with my Dad will turn out the way the cosmic forces want them to turn out. Sometimes you just have to let go and let someone else take the wheel. It relieves some of the stress.
The big thing for me.....now that I am on WW.....is that I don't let the stress break my progress with the diet. I can't give in and have a half of pizza or a platter of nachos. I keep thinking about my goal for a slimmer summer and that seems to help keep me focused.
I have concluded that my Dad will be staying at my house over the weekend to recuperate. This isn't an easy sleepover either. My Dad complains that there isn't anything on TV if he can't find a western or a military movie with John Wayne. Ugh. He stayed with me for a week in December and I have to say I have seen enough Bonanza, Big Valley and High Chaparral episodes to last two lifetimes. My hope is that the cosmic forces see fit to throw a John Wayne Movie Marathon in this weekend. I will be able to get a lot done around the house and he will be as happy as a clam. I will be happy to watch the Super Bowl.
Focus Focus Focus!
Tomorrow, my father has a much needed Prostate surgery and I have my first weigh-in after starting the Hudson & Simpson (WW) diet. I am more positive about my activity tomorrow than my father. He is having a bit of confusion today and thinks that tomorrow will not be a "real" surgery. We had a brief argument over the definition of the term "surgery" and then I just gave up because it wasn't worth the energy. I wish I would take that approach most of the time. Some things aren't worth arguing about when you know you are right.
I continue to focus forward and keep walking. I have decided that things with my Dad will turn out the way the cosmic forces want them to turn out. Sometimes you just have to let go and let someone else take the wheel. It relieves some of the stress.
The big thing for me.....now that I am on WW.....is that I don't let the stress break my progress with the diet. I can't give in and have a half of pizza or a platter of nachos. I keep thinking about my goal for a slimmer summer and that seems to help keep me focused.
I have concluded that my Dad will be staying at my house over the weekend to recuperate. This isn't an easy sleepover either. My Dad complains that there isn't anything on TV if he can't find a western or a military movie with John Wayne. Ugh. He stayed with me for a week in December and I have to say I have seen enough Bonanza, Big Valley and High Chaparral episodes to last two lifetimes. My hope is that the cosmic forces see fit to throw a John Wayne Movie Marathon in this weekend. I will be able to get a lot done around the house and he will be as happy as a clam. I will be happy to watch the Super Bowl.
Focus Focus Focus!
Monday, January 28, 2013
Ahhh Yes......A Diet
So remember my last post? I went on and on about living life and being as healthy as you can be? (Sigh)
After my routine physical, I am now joining forces with Jennifer Hudson and Jessica Simpson. Well, not really, but kinda. I have started Weight Watchers. Again. I say "again" because about 12 years ago it was incredibly successful for me. Back then, they didn't give you extra points for exercise or all the fruits/veggies you could eat. Everything had a point value and when you were out....you were out. No lifelines.....no extra somethin-somethins. You made due until you woke up the next day. It was tough, but it worked. I exercised every day except Friday and in 6.5 months I lost 60 pounds. Seriously!
My doctor advised me that my cholesterol was a little high (226 - but my HDLs were fabulous!) and further advised that a low fat diet was in order. This is where Hudson & Simpson (WW) enter the picture. I am back at it with the support of my loved ones and friends.
I have to wonder, however, if my higher cholesterol numbers could be the result of the very small....ok....heaping tablespoon size.....piece of birthday cake I had four hours before the blood work. I know I know! I knew it was important to fast, but without testing it....."who really knows?", I thought. Kinda like using your cell phone on an airplane. We could have been using them for years because it wasn't going to bring a plane down. So this was my train of thought at the time. My cholesterol wasn't high in Spring 2011 when I had my last check up. Hmmmmm....
All of that aside....I have decided to take it at face value and not ignore the test results because of my birthday "indiscretion". It will be good for me afterall.
Since I found out about the test results late Thursday afternoon, I had time to polish off the extra cake in one last glorifying binge. I have been a good little WW soldier since and doing my thing. I forgot how easy the WW diet can be once you start. It really does work and it isn't just marketing hype that Hudson & Simpson are spewing.
Now, will I look like either one of them after six months? Not hardly.....but I will feel better and turn some heads for just being me.
Ta Ta!
After my routine physical, I am now joining forces with Jennifer Hudson and Jessica Simpson. Well, not really, but kinda. I have started Weight Watchers. Again. I say "again" because about 12 years ago it was incredibly successful for me. Back then, they didn't give you extra points for exercise or all the fruits/veggies you could eat. Everything had a point value and when you were out....you were out. No lifelines.....no extra somethin-somethins. You made due until you woke up the next day. It was tough, but it worked. I exercised every day except Friday and in 6.5 months I lost 60 pounds. Seriously!
My doctor advised me that my cholesterol was a little high (226 - but my HDLs were fabulous!) and further advised that a low fat diet was in order. This is where Hudson & Simpson (WW) enter the picture. I am back at it with the support of my loved ones and friends.
I have to wonder, however, if my higher cholesterol numbers could be the result of the very small....ok....heaping tablespoon size.....piece of birthday cake I had four hours before the blood work. I know I know! I knew it was important to fast, but without testing it....."who really knows?", I thought. Kinda like using your cell phone on an airplane. We could have been using them for years because it wasn't going to bring a plane down. So this was my train of thought at the time. My cholesterol wasn't high in Spring 2011 when I had my last check up. Hmmmmm....
All of that aside....I have decided to take it at face value and not ignore the test results because of my birthday "indiscretion". It will be good for me afterall.
Since I found out about the test results late Thursday afternoon, I had time to polish off the extra cake in one last glorifying binge. I have been a good little WW soldier since and doing my thing. I forgot how easy the WW diet can be once you start. It really does work and it isn't just marketing hype that Hudson & Simpson are spewing.
Now, will I look like either one of them after six months? Not hardly.....but I will feel better and turn some heads for just being me.
Ta Ta!
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Birthdays
Yesterday, I turned forty seven years old. I took the day off from work to take care of me. I had a couple doctors appointments to ensure I am healthy enough to see many many more birthdays.
Recently I have grown more aware of the importance of living the fullest life possible. Mainly it is because I am dealing with an aging parent who is growing weaker and will be ready for full time care in the next year or two. Death is inevitable for those who age and I wonder if it is easier to accept death at 80 than it is now?
The thought of dying and losing the life I have now is a sad one. I have seen friends face and fight cancer - fighting for the right to continue to live a life they do not want to lose. It may be a thought we all have at some point I guess.
So is it just a wearing down of the bodies and faculties that cause seniors to have an inner peace and surrender to death? Or is it simply a willingness to accept that their life has run its fullest course?
So I counteract all of these thoughts with regular check ups to make sure everything is running like clock work and according to my doctors everything looks good! Ok....well....I did get some grief about my weight. It is my only health flaw and struggle at the moment so I promised to do better! I mean....life isn't always easy but we have to do what we must to keep muddling through despite it all.
Today.....I will revisit WW and see if I can drop as much weight as Jennifer Hudson. I mean.....she makes it look easy so it will be easy.....right? Stay tuned........
Recently I have grown more aware of the importance of living the fullest life possible. Mainly it is because I am dealing with an aging parent who is growing weaker and will be ready for full time care in the next year or two. Death is inevitable for those who age and I wonder if it is easier to accept death at 80 than it is now?
The thought of dying and losing the life I have now is a sad one. I have seen friends face and fight cancer - fighting for the right to continue to live a life they do not want to lose. It may be a thought we all have at some point I guess.
So is it just a wearing down of the bodies and faculties that cause seniors to have an inner peace and surrender to death? Or is it simply a willingness to accept that their life has run its fullest course?
So I counteract all of these thoughts with regular check ups to make sure everything is running like clock work and according to my doctors everything looks good! Ok....well....I did get some grief about my weight. It is my only health flaw and struggle at the moment so I promised to do better! I mean....life isn't always easy but we have to do what we must to keep muddling through despite it all.
Today.....I will revisit WW and see if I can drop as much weight as Jennifer Hudson. I mean.....she makes it look easy so it will be easy.....right? Stay tuned........
Thursday, January 17, 2013
Doggy Dog Dog
My dog Kip is a hot mess. He turns three next month and still has a mean puppy streak in him. You can't really tell by this picture, but he is a Chesapeake Bay Retriever. An energetic Chesapeake Bay Retriever. Can you see it? Ha! This was taken on a snow day actually and he was enjoying it as much as I did.
As any dog does....he loves his Mama. He is very loyal and a faithful companion. When I have to take him to the kennel, the house gets eerily quiet and it is a bit lonesome. The big guy has "presence" and a huge heart. Just ask those who he loves and adores. They've been tackled many times.
I had to take him to the kennel tonight because I am heading out of town tomorrow. While he loves Pet Suites and they love him, he doesn't like for me to leave him. It made me a little sad this evening because he literally kept staring at the front door after I walk out of the kennel. How do I know? I peeked in a side window. He was standing there pulling on the leash looking at the door. Tugs on your heart strings....I have to say.
My big hearted guy will be just fine and I will see him on Monday. I am a lucky woman.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
I Didn't Do It
It wasn't me.
I would never do that in a million years.
Or so Lance Armstrong has tried to convince us or himself over the last decade. Kinda reminds me of Hamlet - Act III - "The lady doth protest too much, methinks".
As his world started to crumble around him several years ago, he kept protesting. He was defiant. He even sued people who attempted to blow his secret out of the water. Many other cyclists took the fall in outing themselves in regards to this doping scandal. Everyone else doped, but not Lance. Got it.
Some say this was much bigger than Lance Armstrong. Some say in his admission of guilt he should call out those above him who also knew of the regular doping cycles. Some say that this could also indite the International Cycling Union (UCI) because something this BIG - an American winning seven titles......worldwide publicity and huge corporate sponsors for the events.....brought a lot of new money to the sport than they ever dreamed possible.
What is really a shame is that in his greed for success he brought along a charity with him. A charity that has done marvelous things for a lot of children and adults who suffer from cancer. His good fortune in the sport of cycling drew people to him. People donated freely -believing in him - "the miracle on wheels". The guy who fought cancer and then went on to win another Tour De France title. The charity did wonderful things for so many and hopefully will continue on after a little house cleaning.
So now Oprah gets her hands on him. In an interview today, she said she is satisfied with the answers to her questions during the interview. I hope we will get a chance to see the "insistent and persistent" Oprah. I don't think anyone expects to see a "snowball" interview. I believe she will ask the questions that if given the chance....we would all ask.
A cheater never wins. Haven't any of the sports figures learned that by now?
I would never do that in a million years.
Or so Lance Armstrong has tried to convince us or himself over the last decade. Kinda reminds me of Hamlet - Act III - "The lady doth protest too much, methinks".
As his world started to crumble around him several years ago, he kept protesting. He was defiant. He even sued people who attempted to blow his secret out of the water. Many other cyclists took the fall in outing themselves in regards to this doping scandal. Everyone else doped, but not Lance. Got it.
Some say this was much bigger than Lance Armstrong. Some say in his admission of guilt he should call out those above him who also knew of the regular doping cycles. Some say that this could also indite the International Cycling Union (UCI) because something this BIG - an American winning seven titles......worldwide publicity and huge corporate sponsors for the events.....brought a lot of new money to the sport than they ever dreamed possible.
What is really a shame is that in his greed for success he brought along a charity with him. A charity that has done marvelous things for a lot of children and adults who suffer from cancer. His good fortune in the sport of cycling drew people to him. People donated freely -believing in him - "the miracle on wheels". The guy who fought cancer and then went on to win another Tour De France title. The charity did wonderful things for so many and hopefully will continue on after a little house cleaning.
So now Oprah gets her hands on him. In an interview today, she said she is satisfied with the answers to her questions during the interview. I hope we will get a chance to see the "insistent and persistent" Oprah. I don't think anyone expects to see a "snowball" interview. I believe she will ask the questions that if given the chance....we would all ask.
A cheater never wins. Haven't any of the sports figures learned that by now?
Monday, January 14, 2013
Cocktail Monday
I thought I would start something different on Mondays. Yes I know......cocktail stuff on Monday? Why not Hump Day or Friday? Isn't it too early in the week? What's wrong with you?
Pffffft. :)
I have had a bit of an inventive streak lately with drink mixology so here is what is hopefully the first of many "Cocktail Monday" blogs - most of which will be original creations!
Whipped Berry
2 ounces Whipped Cream Vodka
4 ounces Cranberry Juice
This drink is so blind of the alcohol it is dangerous. Reminds me of those fruity beverages that I loved to drink as a kid. You get a whiff of the whipped cream vodka as your lips approach the glass and it also cuts the bite of the cranberry juice.
It is lovely.....just lovely.
Cheers!
Pffffft. :)
I have had a bit of an inventive streak lately with drink mixology so here is what is hopefully the first of many "Cocktail Monday" blogs - most of which will be original creations!
Whipped Berry
2 ounces Whipped Cream Vodka
4 ounces Cranberry Juice
This drink is so blind of the alcohol it is dangerous. Reminds me of those fruity beverages that I loved to drink as a kid. You get a whiff of the whipped cream vodka as your lips approach the glass and it also cuts the bite of the cranberry juice.
It is lovely.....just lovely.
Cheers!
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Guilty Pleasures
Sunday mornings are my favorite mornings. I have no errands to run, no appointments or meetings. It's just me, my dog, coffee and the newspaper. Yes...a newspaper. Oh don't get me wrong....I do my fair share of perusing the "web world" for interesting news, sports columns, etc., but on Sunday morning it's different. There is nothing better to me than sitting down with a sizable cup of coffee and reading the paper in the morning. Unfortunately....unless I am on vacation, I only get to do this on Sundays.
Since I enjoy this so much, why do I call it a "guilty pleasure"? It certainly is an interesting choice of words that perhaps we all misuse. I enjoy my Sunday mornings. I don't feel guilty and I don't care what you think about it. So....maybe it is my "non-guilty pleasure". If this is true, then why do we even use the term "GP"? Do what you do and enjoy it when you do it. Right?
I think the problem is that we really don't allow ourselves to do everything we enjoy without attaching some kind of guilt to it. There is a time and place for everything. We all have obligations that we need to fulfill - jobs, parents, children....and we set time aside to do those things that require our full participation or concentration. So why don't we say......STOP.....tomorrow I am taking 2 hours to give something back to myself and I am not going to allow it to become a guilty pleasure. I and everyone around me deserve to have a happier me and by taking these two hours for me.....I am serving all of mankind.
Coffee anyone? :)
Since I enjoy this so much, why do I call it a "guilty pleasure"? It certainly is an interesting choice of words that perhaps we all misuse. I enjoy my Sunday mornings. I don't feel guilty and I don't care what you think about it. So....maybe it is my "non-guilty pleasure". If this is true, then why do we even use the term "GP"? Do what you do and enjoy it when you do it. Right?
I think the problem is that we really don't allow ourselves to do everything we enjoy without attaching some kind of guilt to it. There is a time and place for everything. We all have obligations that we need to fulfill - jobs, parents, children....and we set time aside to do those things that require our full participation or concentration. So why don't we say......STOP.....tomorrow I am taking 2 hours to give something back to myself and I am not going to allow it to become a guilty pleasure. I and everyone around me deserve to have a happier me and by taking these two hours for me.....I am serving all of mankind.
Coffee anyone? :)
Friday, January 11, 2013
As Time Goes By
So raise your hand if your parents are over 75. I know there are a few of you out there who are now in the position of "raising your parents".
I have never had children so I have no earthly clue how to raise them and keep them safe. With that said, I do see however, the comparison between raising a child and dealing with aging parents who are in "Winter Solstice". I still have to make sure they are safe, secure, medicinally sound and manage their finances to the extent that they aren't giving money away to every charity that calls them on the phone.
I am in the unique position of being the only child to raise my two aging parents who live in separate households. Mom is better off than Dad.....mentally, physically and financially. Dad doesn't like Mom for any of those positives. Dad is cantankerous and has early onset dementia. Mom can be cantankerous, but has come a long way since she came to the realization that I am all she has now. Dad would love to continue to live like he is working full time, but realizes that the social security check is the only thing he has coming in so he has to "fake" it. Mom is on zero medications and Dad takes meds for his heart and blood pressure. Both of them live alone and both hate the words "assisted living" and "nursing home". Mom is uber prepared for her old age - POA, will and funeral arrangements. Dad has not given me POA, wants to be cremated and can't remember where he put the copy of his will.
(Cue the circus music)
I realize that I have spoken about aging parents before in an earlier post. In 2009, my Dad's medical conditions were just starting. The only thing I knew at the time was that this was the first parental challenge I would face alone without my brother. Time has gone by....quickly yet slowly. It has me looking down the road and thinking about tough decisions and how I will make them for my Dad with the little authority that has been granted to me. I don't want to have to think about broken hips or car accidents. I don't want to think about the point of no return and how will I will I get him in a facility that will allow me to sleep soundly at night. He doesn't realize that some of the decisions he is making is because of the dementia. He thinks he is fine. He thinks he can still drive. Luckily, he doesn't have a car. He eats at Bob Evan's once or twice a day. The man could live on blueberry crepes for the rest of his life, however it isn't the most nutritious thing.......especially with the extra whipped cream.
(Look I can juggle too!)
Doctors appointments at the drop of a hat has kept me scrambling with my job. Luckily, I have a boss who is going through something similar with his parents so he is understanding. Since I work remotely (from home), I have been able to catch up with work early in the morning or late in the evening, but there are still too many days I have taken off to go somewhere or to meet with someone.
So while my life is very much like a circus, I am learning the lessons of raising an elderly child. I am learning that it likely was not easy for my parents to raise me and my brother either. It had its ups and downs, trials and tribulations. I have to think that my parents also looked at child rearing as having a beginning and an end. I did leave home, go to college, got a real job, bought a house and lived on my own after all. I was not a child forever.
Our roles as parent and child have switched. I never thought it would be like this. As they grow older and weaker, I grow stronger. My parents.....especially my Dad.....will not be elderly forever. While there will be more trials and tribulations ahead, I feel satisfied knowing that I will have seen both of them off to their next life after death.
I have never had children so I have no earthly clue how to raise them and keep them safe. With that said, I do see however, the comparison between raising a child and dealing with aging parents who are in "Winter Solstice". I still have to make sure they are safe, secure, medicinally sound and manage their finances to the extent that they aren't giving money away to every charity that calls them on the phone.
I am in the unique position of being the only child to raise my two aging parents who live in separate households. Mom is better off than Dad.....mentally, physically and financially. Dad doesn't like Mom for any of those positives. Dad is cantankerous and has early onset dementia. Mom can be cantankerous, but has come a long way since she came to the realization that I am all she has now. Dad would love to continue to live like he is working full time, but realizes that the social security check is the only thing he has coming in so he has to "fake" it. Mom is on zero medications and Dad takes meds for his heart and blood pressure. Both of them live alone and both hate the words "assisted living" and "nursing home". Mom is uber prepared for her old age - POA, will and funeral arrangements. Dad has not given me POA, wants to be cremated and can't remember where he put the copy of his will.
(Cue the circus music)
I realize that I have spoken about aging parents before in an earlier post. In 2009, my Dad's medical conditions were just starting. The only thing I knew at the time was that this was the first parental challenge I would face alone without my brother. Time has gone by....quickly yet slowly. It has me looking down the road and thinking about tough decisions and how I will make them for my Dad with the little authority that has been granted to me. I don't want to have to think about broken hips or car accidents. I don't want to think about the point of no return and how will I will I get him in a facility that will allow me to sleep soundly at night. He doesn't realize that some of the decisions he is making is because of the dementia. He thinks he is fine. He thinks he can still drive. Luckily, he doesn't have a car. He eats at Bob Evan's once or twice a day. The man could live on blueberry crepes for the rest of his life, however it isn't the most nutritious thing.......especially with the extra whipped cream.
(Look I can juggle too!)
Doctors appointments at the drop of a hat has kept me scrambling with my job. Luckily, I have a boss who is going through something similar with his parents so he is understanding. Since I work remotely (from home), I have been able to catch up with work early in the morning or late in the evening, but there are still too many days I have taken off to go somewhere or to meet with someone.
So while my life is very much like a circus, I am learning the lessons of raising an elderly child. I am learning that it likely was not easy for my parents to raise me and my brother either. It had its ups and downs, trials and tribulations. I have to think that my parents also looked at child rearing as having a beginning and an end. I did leave home, go to college, got a real job, bought a house and lived on my own after all. I was not a child forever.
Our roles as parent and child have switched. I never thought it would be like this. As they grow older and weaker, I grow stronger. My parents.....especially my Dad.....will not be elderly forever. While there will be more trials and tribulations ahead, I feel satisfied knowing that I will have seen both of them off to their next life after death.
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Will I See Snow......
...when I am 75?
It's a fair question to ask and ponder. Those of use who are lucky to live in the Midwest can recount many hair-raising winter weather stories from our youth. Yet these days.....and I would say in the last three years.....we have less stories to tell.
In the Cincinnati area, 2012 was the warmest winter season ever. Temperatures below 20 were rare and we received a total of five inches of snow for the season. Our average is approximately 22 inches. Yes......22 inches. My usual 1976 winter storm story has only been bested once with a storm we had in 2005 or 2006 (keep me honest folks) where we received 16 inches of snow in 24 hours.
Today we are seeing another warming trend along with some rain. Temps are projected to be hovering in the 50's and reach a high of 60's on one or two days over the next five days. Yeah....I guess you could say...so why complain? Be thankful its not snowing buckets. Hmmm.
I guess the whole global warming thing has been my concern. A recent news story showed a graphical display of how warm the earth is getting over the last several decades. Apparently there are sensors located around the world that are sending back data to one central source. The temperature increase is disturbing to witness.
Which leads me to my question......will I see a snowfall when I am 75? Will the Earth's temperature heat up so much that snowfalls will occur so randomly that the "winter season" will take on a completely different meaning?
We may have reached the point of no return in regards to global warming. We can't say we weren't warned.
It's a fair question to ask and ponder. Those of use who are lucky to live in the Midwest can recount many hair-raising winter weather stories from our youth. Yet these days.....and I would say in the last three years.....we have less stories to tell.
In the Cincinnati area, 2012 was the warmest winter season ever. Temperatures below 20 were rare and we received a total of five inches of snow for the season. Our average is approximately 22 inches. Yes......22 inches. My usual 1976 winter storm story has only been bested once with a storm we had in 2005 or 2006 (keep me honest folks) where we received 16 inches of snow in 24 hours.
Today we are seeing another warming trend along with some rain. Temps are projected to be hovering in the 50's and reach a high of 60's on one or two days over the next five days. Yeah....I guess you could say...so why complain? Be thankful its not snowing buckets. Hmmm.
I guess the whole global warming thing has been my concern. A recent news story showed a graphical display of how warm the earth is getting over the last several decades. Apparently there are sensors located around the world that are sending back data to one central source. The temperature increase is disturbing to witness.
Which leads me to my question......will I see a snowfall when I am 75? Will the Earth's temperature heat up so much that snowfalls will occur so randomly that the "winter season" will take on a completely different meaning?
We may have reached the point of no return in regards to global warming. We can't say we weren't warned.
Wednesday, January 09, 2013
Stretch and Yawn
After a long - a very long - siesta away from blogging, I thought perhaps that I would just delete this blog since I had not written anything since July 2011, but after reading a few posts, I decided that I had an "investment" in this blog. It is an emotional, mental and almost spiritual investment that I don't want to lose by simply pressing the delete key.
So after a good stretch and a solid yawn.....I am back to use this forum as an outlet for my candid opinions and observations.
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on."
Robert Frost
So after a good stretch and a solid yawn.....I am back to use this forum as an outlet for my candid opinions and observations.
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on."
Robert Frost
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