So today was C & D's annual holiday brunch. The food, decor and conversation were outstanding, as always. We'll post a picture of the dancing/singing gay snowman soon!
As we talked about the crappy real estate market, our kids, lack there of, or procuring sperm for creating future kids, the conversation turned to retirement. Some of us are closer than others, and some of us are pretty sure we'll never be able to afford to retire. We're quite confident we've come up with a marketable proposition to help us all ease comfortably into our gay old age.
It won't be your traditional lesbian retirement community -- money alone won't buy you a spot and weekly bingo. We're planning something a bit more exclusive.
We think about 10 acres somewhere here in the Tri-state would get us started. A nice, tree-filled space, long, winding driveway, perhaps a small pasture or two for goats, alpaca, a few horses.
A retinal scanner at the gate will ensure proper identity and security. And the moat, of course, will be the perfect final deterrent to prevent the bevy of those-whose-names-will-not-be-spoken here from gaining entry and disturbing our golden years.
Then there'll be a lengthy application process conducted by the admissions office,(okay, actually that's D and myself; I won't speak for her, but I have trust issues that require my involvement!). We'll start with a psychological screening, perhaps administer a personality type test or two, conduct a credit report analysis, do an astrological chart, and conclude with an intensive survey of how involved the individual has been in the more damaging activities on the local lesbian scene.
We think we can meet most daily living needs via careful marketing to those around today's table and a handful of others -- a couple of nurses, a massage therapist or three, a professor/organic gardener, accountant, one or two IT types to keep us web-connected.
Aside from deciding what limits to set on the cat population, the plan is coming together nicely.
Champagne punch in a snowman cup is quite the thing...