Commitment ceremonies

Otherwise known as marriage ceremonies, civil union ceremonies or life partnership ceremonies.......

For those of us who are gay and not living in a state where it is a legal and binding statute, it is a symbolic union of two souls. My question is...........if it doesn't carry any legal weight, why do it?

Many of you know couples who have been partners for over a dozen of years who have not taken the step of having a commitment ceremony in front of all of their friends and family members. I believe that one of the reasons that long term partners do not have commitment ceremonies is because their security with themselves and each other is well grounded. They have nothing to prove to anyone about their commitment to each other. The friends who surround couples such as these are well aware of their commitment and admire them for having the longevity and permanence that most gay and lesbian couples crave.

So then what is it about having a ceremony? Is it simply a "show and tell" event? Is it a way for one or both people in the relationship to overcome a insecurity? ("See I am lovable and we are together")

Now if you are going to say, a ceremony like this is a way for everyone to share in the joy of the couples new union together......I don't know if I buy that. As I said earlier, I know of a few long term couples and I have great admiration for their commitments to each other. It didn't take a ceremony for me to share their joy or clearly understand their commitment.

I think those who jump into commitment ceremonies in Year One or Two of their relationship are probably overcoming some kind of insecurity. Some kind of inner need to show everyone that they are committed instead of just letting things grow freely and naturally. Those that have commitment ceremonies early don't always have the relationship longevity that they hoped for in the beginning.

I have been in a relationship for two years and I am no less committed to her than I would be if we jumped in with a ceremony. I believe that the longevity of your relationship is a silent statement all to itself. What more is there to say?

So what say YOU? Have you been through a ceremony or contemplating a ceremony? What is your viewpoint on it? There are no right or wrong answers here...........only opinions.